Today I was out getting groceries/running errand etc. sporting my “Show Your Love” T-shirt that I received for my fundraising efforts in February. As I was leaving the store I was in I heard a group of I’d say 18-24 year old guys utter those unfortunately familiar words “nice shirt fag” followed by some other derogatory comments which I will not repeat. I turned and said “excuse me?” Surrouned their peers the two who uttered the remarks felt compelled to put on a show. Explaining how homosexuals aren’t natural and immoral. I laughed and set in to impart some knowledge tackling the first argument of unnatural I explained how there is biological evidene that supports homosexuality whether it ,be the genes linked to chromosomes 7,8, and 10, or the existence of H-Y antigen which the mother develops and has been correlated with different development and the prenatal brain, or the correlation between the difference in the size of the hypothalmus of homosexual monozygotic (identical) twins from heterosexual males. They stood silent with a blank I lack the intelligence to underestand or retalliate at this point to comment look. I moved to their second argument about the “immoral” having just read an interesting article on this matter I said that even the Catholic Church teaches that homosexual to use the articles word “feelings, thoughts, or inclinations” are not immoral. The Church’s teaching on the matter is that intercourse without the purpose of procreation is the immoral part. So according to Catholic doctorine heterosexuals who use condoms, birth control etc. are just as “immoral” as any homosexual couple.
I concluded with the most valid arument that an individual’s sexual orientation has no bearing on the type of person they are. And everyone should be respected for who they are not what.
They walked away silently as a small crowd had gathered becuase I had been speaking for several minutes now and well I get excited when I talk and attract attention. My words probably will never leave that parking lot but maybe someone will go home a little more informed and maybe just maybe change their perspective
Totally outRIGHT Leadership Event - The June 2012 edition
Posted May 7th, 2012 by Rui | No CommentsDo you have four days to be smarter, healthier and sexier?
Totally outRIGHT is a for young gay and bi guys who want to
be community leaders, including:
• guys from diverse communities
• transguys
• guys living with HIV
Happening: June 2, 9, 16 and 23
Please register by May 14, 2012
Contact Rui Pires at 416-340-8484 ext. 264
or rpires@actoronto.org.
Check out actoronto.org/to for more info.
Posted in category: Sexual Health and STIs, Upcoming Events | Tags: ACT, AIDS Committee of Toronto, Bi Men, bisexual, Gay, Gay Men, leadership, Male, Totally outRIGHT
Q? Y Art? Project for South Asian LGBTTIQQ2S/WSW/MSM Youth
Posted May 4th, 2012 by QYArt Project | No Comments
Call out to South Asian Youth (13 – 19)* to participate in free youth by youth arts program to explore arts as a form of self-expression. The program will run on Tuesdays and Thursdays from May 15-31, 2012 from 4:30 pm - 8:00 pm at Parkdale Community Health Centre (1229 Queen Street West, Toronto ON M6K 1L2). The location is fully wheelchair accessible, including washrooms and has single stall washrooms.
Q? Y Art? is a 6 session multi-disciplinary arts program for South Asian youth (13-19) who identify as members of the LGBTTIQQ2S/WSW/MSM communities; youth will engage in arts practices, create portfolios and launch their work.
*Note: There is a second group that will run mid-summer for youth 20-29; please visit this section on our website for details and application.
Come to:
- Hang out and learn from youth artists
- Experiment with multiple art forms
- Use art for self-expression
- Connect and build community with peers
- Have your work published and launched
Other information:
- Food and TTC Tokens will be provided
- High school students can complete part of their community service hours requirement through this program
This arts and leadership program will include creative writing and performance opportunities, plus an opportunity to talk about histories as well as current events, as they can relate to South Asian LGBTTIQQ2S/WSW/MSM youth. The program works to challenge queer and trans phobia, as well as racism - we’re trying to create a space for youth to talk about how they experience these, whether external or internalized. There is definitely room for you to tailor the program to what you want!
Please visit our website: www.qyartproject.com for application forms and for program details including our values, safety, confidentiality and other resources.
Please visit our website: www.qyartproject.com for program details including our values, safety, confidentiality and other resources. Application forms for Group 1 (Youth 13-19) can be found here and for Group 2 (Youth 20-29) can be found here.
Please submit your application by Friday, May 11th to qyartproject@gmail.com, if you are between 13 – 19.
We will get in touch with people as we receive applications! Send in yours as soon as possible!
If you are interested in being involved in this program, but have needs and requirements not reflected please contact us at qyartproject@gmail.com for info and feedback.
You can also reach us at:
Phone: (416) 599-2727 ext. 230
Find us on Facebook: Q? Y Art? Project
Twitter: @QYArtProject
This project is funded by ArtReach Toronto and the Community One Foundation.
Posted in category: Arts and Expression, Queer and Trans Communities of Colour, Upcoming Events, youth group | Tags: south asian
Body Blues
Posted April 30th, 2012 by raybg89 | No CommentsI shake my protein canister, pop open the lid, and catch a whiff of the brownish sludge swimming inside. It smells fucking rank. I hold my breath and take a big swig. I nearly gag -it tastes exactly as it smells, like chemical pet food. My stomach heaves and snarls in protest. I make a face as I chuck the entire container into the trash bin. A discarded copy of this month’s Men’s Health magazine lies in the trash can with a topless blonde man flexing on the cover. The headline reads “How to get abs like these in only seven days!” The model looks like the Hulk and the veins on his muscles threaten to take over his body. The protein shake falls on top of the magazine and slowly oozes dark viscous protein cum over the models bare torso. I sigh and walk towards my mirror. I pull my shirt over my head, toss it aside, and face the bare chested reflection of myself. My arms look skinny and twig-like which goes along nicely with the hollow branches of my ribs. My chest pitifully stares back at me – flat and deflated. I suck in my gut and brace by midsection so I can make my abs pop out. Nothing. Fuck -I need softer lighting.
I run my fingers along the curve of my chest. When I was in grade seven my younger brother told me I had “man-boobs.” I remember doing push-ups every night after that.
I flex my right bicep and brush my fingers along the small mound of muscle. I had never won any arm wrestling matches in high school and I always wore long sleeve shirts to hide my thin arms.
I slap my stomach. During summer camp, a fellow camp councillor told me I was “skinny-fat.” I wasn’t quite too sure of what she meant but I was careful to leave the swimming pool last so that no one could see me topless.
I glance back at the Men’s Health magazine in the garbage and raise my arms above my head to copy the male model’s pose. I curl up my lip and flex real hard so I can look sexy- maybe. Nope. Still skinny. Still me.
The words ectomorph, mesomorph, and endomorph leap around in my head. I’m an ectomorph -the skinny body type. Endomorphs bodies have higher amounts of body fat. The guy on the front of Men’s Health magazine is a mesomorph -the tall Spartan warrior body type. A body made for cutting down foes, leaping over moats and using brute strength to crush your enemies.
My body’s genetic make-up comes from my dad’s side. It’s a gene pool that countless farmers have contributed to – not warriors. A body made for plowing the fields and carrying rice bags. Even now, I feel that my body is aligned with my beliefs. I’m a pacifist and not much of a fighter so it makes sense that my body has long legs and a light frame; it’s a body made for running away – not fighting.
That’s not to say I’m not able to achieve the muscular look. Just because my body is natural inclined is to be skinny it isn’t something that is set in stone. If I really wanted to, I’d shove those chemical concoctions down my throat, eat enough food for three people, and go to the gym every day. It would take a lot of work but it’s not impossible.
I take another look at my right arm; I remember helping my friend Esther move her things into her new apartment; my arms were so sore from all the lifting I thought they would fall off.
I grip my left bicep and grin. I remember hugging Ian close to me on the dance floor. He said he liked my arms as he pulled me in closer to him.
I stroke my chest and I remember how I helped Mario push his car down the road on a Friday evening when his car engine died.
I slap my stomach again and I remember countless Friday nights with family and friends at all-you-can-eat sushi restaurants.
My body and I have been through a lot. It may not be a Men’s Health or the Spartan warrior body but it has saved my ass more times than I can count. I appreciate all my body has done for me and all the things it has yet to do. I don’t value my body based on its image. I value it for what it enables me to do: walking, running, and lifting (let’s not forget about sex). Ectomorph, endomorph, and mesomorph mean nothing to me. I have a body made for loving and a body made to be loved. I grin and raise my arms above my head and flex. Yup. Still me. Still pretty fucking sexy.
Posted in category: Arts and Expression | Tags: body image, gay body, I'm sexy and I know it, lgbtq, queer
Arts Funding, Youth Awards and Volunteer Opportunities!
Posted April 27th, 2012 by Bernice Youth Line | No CommentsPhew! Have you seen our Facebook timeline or Twitter feed recently? Opportunities are a-plenty at the Youth Line these days. In case you’re having a hard time keeping up, here’s a summary with links below.
Community Youth Awards
Every year, LGBTTIQA2S youth across the province are doing remarkable things. But where are the opportunities to come together and celebrate these amazing people and achievements?
Now. This is your chance!
Nominate yourself, someone you know or a group you love for one of these eight awards, and let’s together do exactly that.
- Outstanding Contribution to Queer Youth Visibility
- Outstanding Contribution to Trans Youth Visibility
- Outstanding Contribution in an Academic Environment
- Outstanding Contribution to Arts & Culture
- Outstanding Contribution to Social & Health Services
- Outstanding Contribution to Social Justice
- Outstanding Contribution to Community Empowerment
- Outstanding Personal Achievement
The 14th Annual Community Youth Awards will be held in the evening of Sunday, June 24, 2012 at Glenn Gould Studio at the CBC Building in Toronto. Travel and accommodations for award winners and their nominators are provided.
The nomination deadline has been extended to May 7, 2012. To submit a nomination, click here.
The Spirit of Will Munro Award
Will Munro was Punk-rocker, DJ, queer activist, artist, volunteer, civic glue to Toronto queer culture. In his memory, each year, The Spirit of Will Munro Award grants $10,000 to an Ontario LGBTTIQA2S youth or an Ontario LGBTTIQA2S youth-led organization to establish an event, project, organization or business at the local level that uses the arts* and provides youth-friendly, sustainable community growth for LGBTTIQA2S people. This award is made possible with the generous support of Kristyn Wong-Tam.
This year’s application deadline is April 30, 2012. For details on the award and the award application, click here.
Board of Directors
Many non-profit organizations have a Board of Directors to help guide the direction and realize the mission of the organization. At the Youth Line, we have a Board of Directors with a majority of youth members working with non-youth members to accomplish this important task. Individuals new to being a member of a Board and individuals well seasoned in being a member of Boards are all encouraged to volunteer on our Board of Directors. Training and learning opportunities are provided.
We have four openings on our Board that we are currently looking to fill, including the position of Treasurer. If you have interest or experience in these particular areas, this opportunity is for you:
- Program/Service
- Finance/Business
- Anti-Oppression
- Community Outreach
- Marketing/Communications
- Fundraising/Events
Applications are due to board_recruit@youthline.ca by Friday, May 4, 2012. For details on the application, click here.
Peer Support Volunteering
Peer Support Volunteers are the ones who help answer the calls, emails and chats throughout the year. They are 26 years old or younger and able to get to and from Toronto to volunteer. A supervisor is present for all volunteer shifts to provide support and new Peer Support Volunteers are provided 40 hours of training.
Quite frankly, being a Peer Support Volunteer is oodles of fun. It’s a great opportunity to gain new skills, meet more friends and play a positive role in your community. Snacks and TTC tokens are provided during training and volunteering. To find out more about being a Peer Support Volunteer, click here. To apply to be a Peer Support Volunteer, click here. Application deadline for this training session is May 11, 2012.
Pride and Remembrance Run
This year, Youth Line is one of the beneficiaries of the Pride and Remembrance Run happening in Toronto on Saturday, June 30, 2012. Help us support this great event by volunteering to marshall the course, staff the water station, set-up the starting and finish line, prepare the after party, check bags, promote the race or perform general duties. If you’ll be in Toronto during the Pride festival, it will be a few hours of your morning. If you are interested, learn about the volunteer duties by clicking here and email Mohsin at donate@youthline.ca by June 13, 2012.
Missed any of these deadlines for this year? Most of these opportunities are for events that happen once or twice a year. Like us on Facebook or follow us on Twitter to stay up to date on future Youth Line opportunities.
Posted in category: Youth Line | Tags: arts, Board of Directors, community youth awards, funding, Pride, Pride and Remembrance Run, the spirit of Will Munro Award, volunteer, youth recognition
SNEAK PEEK of Switch It Up PSA Video
Posted April 19th, 2012 by Bernice Youth Line | No Comments
When the Youth Line partnered with Asian Arts Freedom School, Canadian Federation of Students-Ontario, Native Youth Sexual Health Network, OK2BME, Rainbow Youth Niagara, Regional HIV/AIDS Connection, Réseau Access Network and Youth Services Bureau of Ottawa to ask Ontario youth to share experiences of homophobia and transphobia, we knew it would be a powerful experience. We knew the stories that came out of it deserved voice and a platform. What we weren’t ready for is how immediately popular the video would become.
The Backstory
After a year of storytelling workshops and 500+ responses to the question “What does homophobia and transphobia look like, sound like and feel like?”, we were feeling ready to transform this beautiful collection of stories into a Public Service Announcement video. The video would be one part in a package of online resources to help us all challenge the role homophobia and transphobia plays in our lives and in our communities. This Switch It Up package will also include anti-homophobia and anti-transphobia posters, a campus mobilization guide co-authored with the Canadian Federation of Students-Ontario, and more. All of it free for downloading, sharing and reprinting on our website. The whole kit and kaboodle would be ready for launch in time for International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia on May 17th.
We began working with the production studio Meld Media to help take the video from an idea to a reality. They jumped on board to the project eager to help and wholly committed to honouring our stories. Many conversations and countless hours of work later, we came up with a video that brought to life the power of the stories we heard. Those of us involved in the making of the video felt instantly connected to it. We could feel in our bones the truth in these stories. We were excited to show it to the world.
So we started pouring ourselves into working on the rest of the Switch It Up toolkit. If just one part of the stories we heard led to such moving 90 seconds, imagine what else these stories could do. One day to our surprise, while designing posters about homophobia and transphobia, we were tagged in an excited tweet with a link to our PSA video. It was then retweeted by WITNESS.ORG to almost 330,000 Twitter users. Soon thereafter, we were tagged in an excited Facebook status congratulating us on a beautiful video.
We were all so anxious to reveal the video that out of a miscommunication, the PSA video was posted by our production team to YouTube and Vimeo. In its first two weeks, it was viewed by almost 4,000 people. The feedback has been waves of compliments and emotions. Before we were prepared to be, we were overwhelmed by the positive reception we hoped for the video. We’ve decided to leave the videos up because it turns out, the magic of this video cannot be contained.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to watch it, share their story with us, and helped make this the beautiful and honest video that it is. Special thanks to Meld Media, the community partners and all the youth participants.
Be sure to come back to the Youth Line website on May 16th, the eve of International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia, for the rest of the Switch It Up package and more awesomeness!
Posted in category: Queer Resources, Youth Line | Tags: homophobia, international day against homophobia and transphobia, switch it up, transphobia, video
Summer Boys
Posted April 18th, 2012 by raybg89 | No Comments
Carly Rae Jepsen's "Call me Maybe" has her doing quadruple takes on this boy
I dread the summer. The unbearable heat, humid air, and bloodthirsty mosquitoes -but none of these compare to my fear of…summer boys. The boys who walk around in shirts that show too much of their arms, the boys who walk around in tank-tops, and the boys who go topless…those are the boys that give me trouble. As a young twenty-something gay man, I can’t help but gawk at such glaring displays.
Take for example, my weekend trip to the grocery store. Here I was walking through the street – gladly looking forward to picking up some milk- when all of a sudden man wearing a tank-top walked by me. The tank-top revealed a good portion of his arms which were large and pleasing to my eye (but really, I mean to my groin). I felt my eyes strain themselves to zoom in on his arms as my head turned to view his passing figure. Get a load of THAT guy my brain screamed.
Suddenly, I felt extremely conscious of my double-take and I felt the heat rush to my face. I quickly looked around to see if anyone else had noticed my wandering eyes. Luckily, no one else had taken notice and I went along my way.
A couple days later, the same thing happened but this time it was a shirtless jogger that trapped my eyes. After noticing his glistening sweat and heaving muscles, I was left momentarily blind and speechless as my eyes gave out and my brain imploded. Again, I felt a rush of shame flood my face as my eyes fell to the floor.
After some personal reflection, I questioned the after effects of my double takes. I have often seen heterosexual men and women openly do the infamous “double take” on passing strangers – I mean openly staring in public is impolite - but why did I feel ashamed for looking?
As a gay man, I am proud of my attraction to men and of my sexuality – so why did I feel this way?
I often forget that I was not born into a gay culture -I was born into a heterosexual one. There is always that innate voice of “heteronormality” in the back of my mind. One that was born out of countless messages condemning my sexuality, telling me it’s unnatural to be gay. That it is something to be ashamed of and hidden. Like many others, I was not born a proud gay man; I became one by overcoming oppression and learning to love myself.
Even though I am proud of my sexuality, there are times when I realize how affected I am by heteronormal society. I realized I felt ashamed of doing “double takes” because I thought it only acceptable for heterosexuals to openly “check each other out.” Why? I don’t know why – but I’m guessing a life time of movies, books, T.V shows, and other things found in mainstream media might be the reason for that self-shame. I often find the lack of anything “gay” in media frustrating. It’s as if my own sexuality isn’t valid and that it should be “hidden.” Even if it is represented it’s often touched upon lightly and without too much detail. Oh sure, let’s watch 2 guys kiss and then have sex “off-screen.”
Sometimes, even the little things count. Like seeing a commercial where a gay man checks out another man (I applaud Carly Rae Jepsen’s video for showing some gay love)-or a commercial that depicts a woman’s first date with another woman. Small things like these can work wonders for inscribing acceptance and tolerance within society. Unfortunately – the lack of such media makes me wonder if society is truly accepting of homosexuality – not just the notion but the actions that come along with it.
I not only want my existence to be validated but my feelings, my wants, and my urges as well.
I know that next time; I will take pride in my double takes. I will take pride in the actions I do that validate my homosexuality.
So if you see me ogling you from afar, don’t worry – I’m only admiring your shirt…or your lack of one.
Posted in category: Arts and Expression | Tags: Carly Rae Jepsen, Gay, gay life, gay teen, heteronormality, lgbtq, queer, summer boys
Inception
Posted April 17th, 2012 by WRiles | No CommentsYou
need to take 10 minutes and read this article. It’s a letter from a Conservative Christian mother to blogger
Dan Pearce, who wrote a piece aptly titled, ‘I’m Christian, unless you’re gay’
a few months back.
In the original blog, Pearce talks poignantly about a phone
conversation he had with his friend Jacob, a homosexual. Jacob despairs over how his parents deny his existence and how friends suddenly disappear when he comes out to them. (Side note: those people probably aren’t good friends to begin with, let’s be honest here.)
Pearce reflects on how this judgement happens under the banner of
religion and personal belief. He doesn’t condemn one sect or another but
instead critiques the ability of people to self righteously hate on anyone who
doesn’t believe or act the same way as them: be it gays, struggling addicts,
the homeless, different religions, lifestyles, you
name it. To quote Pearce
satirizing this system of judgment: ‘“God hates people that aren’t just like
me.”’ (You can check out that article if you’re interested in a little extra-curricular reading.) He talks a lot about
love. He points out that in so many major belief systems, loving your fellow
man is a huge cornerstone. It’s also one that people often
conveniently ignore.
Well the second part, this mother’s response is what I
really wanted to focus on. I wasn’t sure what to expect when I started
reading it. This woman writes about how spitting mad she was that a teacher
gave her son “I’m Christian, unless you’re gay” as a reading assignment. She was offended by it like the good
Christian woman that she was. Then, her son emailed her his response to the
assignment. In it, he came out, remarking upon why he didn’t think he
deserved love any less because of his sexuality and his identity.
She re-read the article, this time through the eyes of her stuck-in-the-middle-of-Conservative-suburbia gay son. A switch inside of her flipped.
This is a story about a story about a story.
Really, this is a story of how remarkable bravery can
completely change the perceptions of people, even the ones who you may think
will never fully understand. This
kid knew Jacob’s story of being left behind by those he cared about for being
gay, but he still wrote what was in his heart. He still took the chance to play
the truth card with his mother, knowing she might not accept it from him. It
worked out for him and now there’s one more ally in the world.
This is a story
that inspires nothing inside me but a swell of hope for the future. It’s all
about how love is more powerful, more important than any religious belief, any
prejudice, any formerly held perception.
We all need that kind of brave, like
the son. We all need the ability to open our hearts up, just like the mother.
And we all need to be able to tell it like it is, like Dan Pearce.
Posted in category: Coming Out | Tags: allies, Love, parents, religion
Free sexual health clinic
Posted April 17th, 2012 by nemo45 | No CommentsAfter me and my boyfriend had been dating a couple months and starting getting serious, I decided it was time to get tested for HIV/AIDS before anything happened, rather than wait until after for something to happen.
Prior to meeting my boyfriend I had gotten a tattoo. The tattoo parlor came highly recommended by some friends, who have all gotten tattoos done there. While the place looked cleaned, and the artists claimed all needles were sterile, you can never be sure, so I decided to get tested for HIV/AIDS.
My friend referred me to a place called the sexual health Hassle Free Clinic, located on the corner at 66 Gerald Street in Toronto.
The hassle free health clinic offers free HIV/AIDS. As well you can request to be tested for sexual transmitted diseases (STI) which includes being tested for Gonorrhea, Chlamydia and Hepatitis A&B.
For a free STI test you can walk in. However for an HIV/AIDs test you need to book an appointment by calling (416) 922-0566.
The clinic is judge free and is available to all everyone.
The clinic hours are below:
Monday: 4 p.m. – 8 p.m.
Tuesday: 10 a.m. – 3 p.m.
Wednesday: 4 p.m. – 8 p.m.
Thursday: 10 a.m. – 3 p.m.
Friday: 4 p.m. – 7 p.m.
Saturday: 10 a.m. – 2 p.m.
While some people think only people in Africa contract HIV/AIDS, as of 2009 65,000 people in Canada are living with HIV/AIDS.
While gay and bi men make up about 44% of the total number. Heterosexual males and females make up about 25% of the total number of people who have HIV/ AIDS, while those who use drugs by needles make up about 21% of that number.
After receiving my results, I am now at ease knowing where I stand. My advice to anyone out there who may be wondering what to do is get tested. No matter what your results are, its always better to know rather then not know.
Posted in category: Sexual Health and STIs | Tags: Free HIV/AIDS testing, Hassle Free Clinic, HIV/AIDS, sexual health, STIs
Show Your Love: Cookies, Raffles, and Coffee, OH MY!
Posted April 16th, 2012 by A.Young | No CommentsI apologize for the lateness of this post–life has gotten the better of me! My normally obsessively organized life has turned to chaos and made me feel like a bit of a fraud, however, I’m back and hoping to resume a fairly regular posting schedule!
Way back in February, my group (for school) was assigned an assignment to design and execute a fundraiser for a youth-based organization. “Youth Line, YOUTH LINE!” was my first response. I’ve been so impressed with the work I’ve seen at Youth Line that I knew my group members would agree that it was an amazing choice. So I called, and asked if it would be alright if we did a fundraiser and was told that not only was it alright but that it coincided with the SHOW YOUR LOVE campaign–FANTASTIC!

Yummy!
On we went with our planning. Rather than do a regular bake sale we wanted to make it a little more interactive, so we made some sugar cookies (which I heard were fabulous) and had icing and a bazillion different kinds of sprinkles for people to decorate. We also had a raffle with some pretty awesome prizes.

People were a little reluctant to come up to the table–it was probably that the beams of excitement just might have been a little too much for some people to handle, so we opted for decorating some cookies ourselves and stalking around the George Brown Campus. Guess who loves awesomely decorated, delicious cookies for only $1.00, raffle tickets, and buttons? STUDENTS DO! It was the saving grace for our fundraiser. Thank you students!
All in all, we had a great time and raised a bit of money while doing it! Thank you group members and thank you Youth Line for all your help!
Check out a few more pictures below!



The group minus me! Natasha, MJ, Jess, Fayzal
Posted in category: Youth Line | Tags: Donate, events, fundraiser, show your love
Chatting with an Asexual Teen
Posted April 15th, 2012 by celestialism | No CommentsIt’s a story we’ve heard thousands of times - a socially clumsy young teen, body awash with new and exciting hormones, suddenly develops confusing new feelings for members of the opposite sex (or the same sex, as the case may be). We all remember what it was like when we began noticing boys or girls in a new way - but what if that had never happened, and would never happen? This is the reality of growing up asexual.
16-year-old Harry Carson attends an arts-focused high school. He plays the tuba in prestigious youth orchestras, and participates in improvisational theatre competitively. He does well in school, especially math and science. Due to his friendly demeanor and quick wit, he never has a shortage of friends. Harry’s a fairly normal eleventh-grader, except for one thing: he’s asexual.
Harry first realized he might be “different” in the eighth grade. “Kids would always ask, ‘Who do you like?’” he recalls, “and I never had an answer, because I just didn’t really care.” The cruel landscape of middle school is difficult enough to navigate for a “normal” adolescent, but add the extra element of a sexual orientation outside the bounds of heterosexuality and it risks becoming hellish. Harry’s experience, however, hasn’t been so bad: “A lot of people liked me, which was strange for me, because I never felt the same way back.” A moment later, he adds, “Except for my mum. I love my mum.”
With love and sex being clear cornerstones of our culture, I wondered if Harry felt that his asexuality would put him at a disadvantage. To the contrary, he argued that “without relationships, life becomes way easier. There’s no awkwardness between people, there’s no forgetting to do homework because you’re thinking about that person.” By this logic, it makes perfect sense that Harry excels at school and in his arts - not even the most skillful and enticing flirtation deters him from the things he cares about most, like math and music.
“It’s also a handicap,” he adds thoughtfully, “because I guess it’s just another thing that takes you away from the general populace. I don’t really care if I’m different, but [the asexuality label] still separates people from people.”
Love and marriage are two major components of our culture’s standard narrative about how life is “supposed to” go - but Harry doesn’t seem at all concerned about not following this trajectory. “I’ll almost definitely not get married, because it just doesn’t seem right,” he explains. “Most probably, I’ll get a really good friend and share a room with that person.” He lights up at this prediction, almost the same way a young girl might light up when discussing the details of her future wedding or the qualities of her future spouse. Despite his asexuality, Harry still delights in his interpersonal relationships, and even forms fantasies about their futures. He’s exactly like a normal teenager, minus one small thing.
Posted in category: Uncategorized | Tags: asexuality, Interview, youth
Rainbow Camp (youth 13-17) August 5th-10th 2012
Posted April 14th, 2012 by Welcome Friend | No Comments
“Come OUT and be yourself!” is the rallying cry for organizers of a new Northeastern Ontario Rainbow Camp. The camp will be a five-day retreat for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered kids, their friends and family members in a beautiful natural setting.
“In our area, and most of Ontario, there is not much in the way of public support for queer people and the camp is our humble effort to offer support,” says Harry Stewart, Chair of the Welcome Friend Association.
Stewart and his husband Chris Southin started the Welcome Friend Association after seeing the documentary “For the Bible Tells Me So.” The film inspired them to hold a conference to provide faith communities the tools to become welcoming to people of differing sexualities. Discussions among participants and members of the local queer community revealed the need for outreach to young people.
The camp is Welcome Friend’s response to that need. It comes at a good time for the area. The Algoma District has been making progress since becoming famous for discrimination in 2002. That’s when high school student Jeremy Dias took the Algoma District Public School Board to the human rights commission alleging his high school in Sault Ste. Marie discriminated against him and students like him. Five years later, the courts awarded Dias Canada’s second-largest human rights settlement.
There is now a local high school with a GSA and a local chapter of Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) is being organized. But, Stewart says, there are still many teens in the area who don’t feel they can come out. As a result, a decades-old trend continues as these young people leave for more accepting larger city centers to the south as soon as they can.
North-America wide, the past year has shown a spike in the numbers of youth who are coming out. But as high profile news stories have shown, these teens are struggling with bullies — sometimes to the extreme where they take their own lives.
This past November, the province of Ontario introduced anti-bullying legislation. The Accepting Schools Act, as it is called, requires all publicly funded schools to support students who want to create diversity clubs such as a Gay-Straight Alliance.
The legislation was introduced a month after a gay Ottawa teenager Jamie Hubley committed suicide — a story that erupted into a media storm.
Jamie’s father, Allan Hubley, who is a city councilor in Kanata had poignant words during a CBC interview about what it is like to lose a child to suicide.
“It takes forever to get to sleep and when you wake up, the first minute is fine until you remember what happened — I lost a beautiful child who was going to make the world a better place,” he said, his voice breaking.
Councilor Hubley talked about how he and his wife supported their son’s coming out as a gay teen and about how Jamie felt he had support from his school guidance counselor and teachers. Yet as Jamie struggled with his own mental health, school bullying caused him grief to a point that he no longer wanted to live.
“I’ve been involved in a lot of things in my community and Jamie was too. . . we wanted to make the world a better place, but I couldn’t fix my own boy and that’s tearing me apart,” said councilor Hubley.
Despite his grief, Hubley said that parents can’t expect teachers to have total control of everything that’s happening in the schools.
“We have to teach our kids to protect their friends and the strangers they see being picked on. We should be stepping up to try and help them.”
Stewart says calls to action like the one from councilor Hubley are exactly why the Welcome Friend Association was inspired to start the Rainbow Camp.
“We are a volunteer group of both straight and queer folks who are creating a safe space where youth can come, be who they need to be and have clear, supportive mentors.” says Stewart.
“At the camp, kids will have the opportunity to explore, ask questions, find others with similar concerns, and hopefully start the ball rolling on creating a safe community — not somewhere else but right here.”
The response has been overwhelming.
“What has been amazing is the number of people, both queer and straight who want to volunteer,” says Stewart. “We’ve had so many people tell us how badly this is needed and how they wish it had been around for them.”
Currently, Rainbow Camp organizers are looking for people to sponsor camp members and put the word out to young people who may be interested in attending.
“Readers can help first, by making sure there is a camp this summer, and second, by working toward a society where there is no need for Rainbow Camp because kids have plenty of spaces to have fun where they can be true to themselves.”
Rainbow camp will be offered August 5-10 for high-school aged youth at Camp McDougall on the shores of Lake Huron, just west of Thessalon. This Camp will provide opportunities for campers to make new friends and develop skills through traditional camp programming. More than anything, Rainbow Camp is a fun place to come OUT and be yourself! Our Camp Program will include activities such as Music, Theatre, and Movement; Arts and Crafts; Nature and the Environment; Sports; Personal Storytelling through Multi-Media.
The full cost of the camp is $275, which includes food, accommodations in rustic cabins and all activities. A registration screening is required for the limited 55 places.
Go to www.welcomefriend.ca for more info and to register. Funding sponsorship is available to eligible campers.
Posted in category: Queer Resources, Upcoming Events, youth group | Tags: Algoma, camp, Northern Ontario, Welcome Friend Association
Book Review: Edmund White
Posted March 21st, 2012 by bdubs | No CommentsI’ve recently been reading some gay interest books and though I’d share my favourite ones. They are A Boy’s Own Story and The Beautiful Room is Empty by Edmund White. These two books are the first two in an award-winning autobiographical trilogy by gay novelist Edmund White. A Boy’s Own Story documents his upbringing in a conservative, Midwestern family during the ‘50’s. It documents his realization that he is gay from his early childhood, when he had a summertime fling with a friend at his cottage, to his teenage years, including his misadventures at a boarding school for boys. A major theme in the book is trying to come to term with one’s masculinity, and this is really highlighted in White’s relationship with his father. I was thoroughly surprised that though White grew up in the ‘50’s I can easily relate to many of the feelings and hardships he describes. The Beautiful Room is Empty picks off at the boarding school, only now White is gaining more independence. As the story progresses we see White travel America, from LA to New York, a la On the Road. This book centers more on the emotional impact of homosexual relationships and anonymous sex. Again, its relevance is astonishing. This book ends in New York on the night of the Stonewall Riots.
What really makes these books so memorable is White’s reflective abilities, and his detailed memory. He describes events that have happened to him many years ago as though they happened just last weekend. His literary style is ornately descriptive, his metaphors are picture perfect. The result is that you feel as though you being allowed into someone’s perfectly kept mind, and they are giving you the grand tour. Beyond the lush landscapes of description, his ability to reflect on his experiences—many of which are peculiar or extraordinary—and draw powerful insights into humanity give the books surprising depth. As a young person, the books have further value as historical fiction. I got to learn about gay life in the ‘50’s-‘60’s through the eyes of a man who was largely in the centre of it all.
In short, Edmund White’s autobiographies are scintillating and illuminating, and I cannot wait to get my hands on the final one in the series, The Farewell Symphony, which deals primarily with the AIDS crisis.
Posted in category: Arts and Expression, Queer Resources | Tags: a boy's own story, book review, edmund white, gay fiction, gay literature, the beautiful room is empty, the farewell symphony
In the battle fields to the end
Posted March 12th, 2012 by JustShane | No CommentsA mind stuck in the battlefields
A heart cut deeply by the isolation of darkness
A spirit waiting and hoping to break free and fight to be
Natures Trojan horse
Warriors fighting for the right to life and freedom
Their swords breaking down injustice of humanity
No one can truly know the potential,
Of a soul willing to die for the right to be a boy
With courage - the challenge he faces,
To achieve a life wroth living and fighting for
Go in fighting without thought of consequence
Your brothers at your back and your heart leaning the way
And believe that the fight CAN be won;
By a mind that is fully committed,
KNOWING the task can be done!
We must have VISION TO SEE our potential,
And FAITH TO BELIEVE that we can;
Then COURAGE TO ACT knowing the odds
Then heart to make it through the THINK AND THIN
It’s our community that gives us HOPE AND POWER AGAINST THE ODDS
Our greatest glory will not be never falling, but RISING EVERY TIME WE FALL stronger than before
Posted in category: Arts and Expression | Tags: poetry
Inside Out Presents: The Wise Kids
Posted March 12th, 2012 by insideout | No CommentsMarch 15, 2012 7pm at TIFF Bell Lightbox
A thoughtful and evocative coming-of-age drama, THE WISE KIDS takes place in the transitional space between high school and college. Set in and around a Charleston, SC Baptist church, weaving through this ensemble piece are three main characters - Brea, an introspective pastor’s daughter experiencing debilitating doubt; the hyperactive Laura, Brea’s best friend and a devout believer; and Tim, the open-hearted son of a single father, confronting his homosexuality for the first time. Tensions and buried feelings abound as Brea, Laura and Tim attempt to hang onto what they have while yearning to break free.
AWARDS
Grand Jury Award: Screenwriting, 2011 Outfest
Grand Jury Award: US Dramatic Feature, 2011 Outfest
SHOUT Audience Award: Best Narrative Feature, 2011 Sidewalk Film Festival
SHOUT Jury Award: Best Narrative Feature, 2011 Sidewalk Film Festival
Audience Award: Best Narrative, 2011 NewFest
Tickets on sale March 8, 2012
Single Tickets: $8 Inside Out members / $10 Public
http://www.facebook.com/events/250006351751102/
Posted in category: Arts and Expression, Coming Out, Upcoming Events | Tags: film, Inside Out, LGBT, queer, video
Gentleman’s rant on homophobia
Posted March 6th, 2012 by BarryV | No CommentsHere’s and interesting video on homophobia from a heterosexual male’s perspective (probably the biggest perpetrator of homophobia in society). After watching this video I thought it was a unique and humorous way to discuss homophobia with a group who may be unwilling to change or accept homosexuality. A couple of great points are made throughout but I feel that it still plays to a stereotypical portrait of what a gay individual is/looks like. They do paint a positive and complimentary portrait but not all people who identify as queer are the GQ cover material they claim, individuals who identify as queer are no different than anyone else and even though the video means well by painting a pretty picture it still perpetuates a stereotype positive or not.
Posted in category: Language and Labels | Tags: allies, Stereotypes, video
The World of Online Dating
Posted March 6th, 2012 by nemo45 | No CommentsOkay so here’s a problem me and my friend have been wrestling with for the past little while, we want to meet other gay guys, but neither of us really fit into the whole gay scene (clubs, excessive drinking, bathhouses) so what do we do?
One of mutual friends suggested we try online dating, a phenomenal which has taken the dating world by storm over the past couple of years. As of 2009, its reported that 17 % of married couples, met their partner on a online dating site, while 1 in 5 couples in a serious relationship, met their partner online.
We’ve all heard horror stories, where two people meet online and start talking, seem to have a connection and decide to meet. However, one of the persons involved lied about who they are, and aren’t who they said they are. While this does happen, I think if done correctly, online dating can be an excellent way to meet people.
If you’re like me, and not into the whole “clubbing scene
” it’s a way to meet and talk to other guys in a more relaxed environment. I’ve found, the few times I have gone to clubs, that its near impossible to strike a conversation and get to know someone because the music is so loud. As well, a lot of the guys you meet at clubs aren’t looking for meaningful conversation. However, when chatting with someone online, it’s more intimate, and you will have a better chance of getting to know that person one on one.
The pressure to do something you don’t feel comfortable doing is extremely lower, because the person your chatting with isn’t right beside you. If the person your chatting with starts to make you feel uncomfortable, you can just log off.
As well, online dating sites allow youth who aren’t living in gay hubs (Toronto, Montreal) to connect with other gay individual’s. Coming from a small town, I know how lonely it can be when you don’t know any other LGBTQ Youth. You feel as if you are the only one out there. The web can help with this feeling, because it allows you to connect with LGBTQ youth from anywhere at any time.
I will say though, if you do plan on meeting someone you have met from an online dating site, be careful. It’s sad to say, but not everyone has the best intentions when it comes to meeting someone from online in person. Meet in a public place, and make sure someone knows where you are.
With technology becoming more predominate in our lives, one day going to bars and clubs to meet your next partner could be considered irregular and online dating sites will be considered the norm.
Posted in category: Gay Online LGBT comming out | Tags: 21st Century Gay Culture, online dating
Xtra Exposed
Posted March 2nd, 2012 by ftmark | No CommentsThis afternoon I happened to be sitting on a train on the way home from a conference when I overheard a conversation. My friends and I tried to ignore the people who were talking loudly, until we heard one of them nearly shout, “We’re not transphobic!” A silence fell over me and my pals as we hushed ourselves and listened in. The people I was with were all cis women and trans allies, and I’m a trans guy, so it felt important to know what was going on.
A buddy of mine leaned over and whispered in my ear, “That’s Andrea Huston and she works with Xtra, and she’s with Jeremy Dias who works from Jer’s vision.” After that was explained it was pretty evident that these people were probably discussing the current controversy over whether or not Xtra (which is a Queer magazine in Toronto) is transphobic. For those that don’t know, Xtra has a bad habit of using incorrect pronouns for trans folk and even exposing birth-names of trans people. Also, when called out to apologize, Xtra has either given half-hearted apologies or simply given an excuse (“using the pronoun ‘they’ in a singular form would be too confusing for our readers”).
From that point on I was on edge, at first I thought I would just ignore the people talking and try to read my book. That’s when I heard Andrea say, “We have a right to journalism. We were just telling a story!” Boy, did that get my blood boiling. A right to journalism? How about a person’s right to privacy or respect for their gender identity? Unfortunately, I didn’t feel comfortable confronting them on the train, but after some thought I decided that I have a right to journalism too.
Taking out my notebook I quickly began to take note of the situation. I’d like to state now that this is all overheard conversation and may not be completely accurate. It is simply what I experienced and interpreted and I will try to only use the direct quotes I wrote down while riding that train. Also, I wasn’t able to hear much of what Jeremy had to say, so the majority of these quotes will be from Andrea.
Andrea went on to say that she believes, “We have been vindicated and the blame has been shifted,” and that Xtra, “works really hard at being inclusive.” She explained that, thanks to this situation (that is, Xtra being called out on being transphobic and being unapologetic) has made some funders want to pull away. From what I understood she seemed to blame the people who were “lashing out” and accusing Xtra of transphobia instead of the people who actually acted oppressively.
Jeremy’s comments were rare and quieter, so all I heard him say was, “You always present both sides of the story,” and, “There’s no way to make everyone satisfied.”
The conversation changed between the two and instead turned to GSA rights in Catholic schools. I feel it’s important to include the following quote that was said during that conversation, by Andrea, “Trans rights and GSA rights, that’s what is most important right now.”
I do not think that these people were intentionally supporting transphobia within the queer community. They both seem like devoted and passionate activists. But to say within the same breath that Xtra is trans inclusive and then that it also had the ‘right to journalism’ when revealing a trans person’s birth name is simply hypocritical.
The reason I’m sharing this information is to spread the word that, despite whatever Xtra has said about being trans inclusive, they are still refusing to accept that they’ve done something wrong. They have obviously not internalized or addressed this underlying problem, and until they do I fear that it will only get worse.
I don’t think that Xtra, or those who work within it, are necessarily transphobic. I think that they have done an act that is transphobic and need to properly address that. I don’t mind so much that they made a mistake, but it’s their blatant ignorance and refusal to accept blame that bothers me.
(link to original post: http://ftmark.tumblr.com/post/18241627256/xtra-exposed)
Posted in category: Trans Communities | Tags: cissexism, trans, transphobia, xtra
Pleasure and Possibilities: A FREE Community Sexual Health Conference for LGBTQ Women
Posted March 2nd, 2012 by PPT.Kate.WSW | No CommentsPlanned Parenthood Toronto presents…
Pleasure and Possibilities!
A FREE Community Sexual Health Conference for LGBTQ Women
Saturday, March 31st • 10am-5pm • Sherbourne Health Centre
The Pleasure and Possibilities conference is a day-long event dedicated to exploring and overcoming barriers to our sexual pleasure as LGBTQ women of diverse bodies and backgrounds. Some days, this world seems hell-bent on making sex feel scary and full of risk, which can make us forget about one of the biggest reasons why we have sex in the first place: feeling good! Sexual health is not just about STI prevention, regular paps, and handling yeast infections…it’s about total well-being: mind, body, and more!
Women who come to Pleasure and Possibilities will have the opportunity to connect with other queer women in a sex-positive space, and engage in whole-body ways with questions like:
What gets in the way of our sexual pleasure?
How can we reclaim our pleasure in the face of these obstacles?
How can we create sexual communities that centre pleasure, and that facilitate it for all people who want it?
For more information, visit our website at pleasureandpossibilities.com!
Pleasure and Possibilities is a project of Planned Parenthood Toronto, in partnership with Women’s Health in Women’s Hands, the 519 Church Street Community Centre and Sherbourne Health Centre. Planned Parenthood Toronto is a United Way member agency.
Posted in category: Sexual Health and STIs, Upcoming Events | Tags: LGBTQ Women, Planned Parenthood Toronto, Sexual Health Conference
Brock Pride Student Unity Conference
Posted March 2nd, 2012 by nemo45 | No CommentsBrock Pride will be holding a conference on March 9th and 10th titled the “Student Pride Conference.” Open to all LGBTQ youth and their allies in high school, college and university.
The Student Pride Conference will be held at Brock University and will consist of seminars, workshops, guest speakers, and presentations. With the purpose of bringing together all members of the LGBTQ community, to try and increase awareness of issues within the LGBTQ community, and drive for change.
The Student Pride Conference will feature key note speakers Vivek Shraya, Toronto based queer musician and Elisha Lim, graphic artist.
The conference will also include positive space and active listening workshops, and will end with Brock Pride’s annual pride dance.
Registration for the Student Pride Conference is $25 which includes two meals. As well, Brock Pride has rented 10 rooms in the Four Points hotel across the street for anyone who wishes to stay overnight. A room costs $139 per night ($23 per person) and holds 6 people.
Anyone wishing to participate can register online or through their GSA.
For more information contact Amie Wright at brockpride@hotmail.com
Posted in category: Upcoming Events | Tags: Brock Pride, Brock Pride Dance, LGBTQ Unity, Student Pride Conferece
Rainbow Youth Niagara’s Sugar Bush Adventure
Posted March 2nd, 2012 by nemo45 | No CommentsRainbow Youth Niagara is organizing a group outing to White Meadows Farms, on March 31, 2012, to take park in White Meadows Sugar Bush Adventure.
This outing is open to all LGBTQ Youth and their allies under the age of 14, as well as their families. Anyone who is interested in attending should arrive at Quest Community Health Centre at 1:00pm, and then everyone will leave together.
There is a small fee to attend this event
Cost:
Youth 13-17= $8.00
Child 2-12=$6.00
Adults=$9.50
However, give whatever you can
The sugar bush adventure, hosted by White Meadows Farms is a guided tour through the forest where participants learn facts about the indigenous trees found there. As well, watch themed presentations to learn more about Canada’s history and Canada’s first maple syrup harvest ever. After the trail walk, participants have the chance to sit around an open fire and listen to native stories, dance to fiddle music and learn how to harvest maple syrup from the trees, by using a hand drill and tree tap.
If anyone is interested in attending this event contact Stephanie Vail at svail@questchc.ca
For more information on the sugar bush adventure, visit White Meadows Farm’s official website
Posted in category: Upcoming Events | Tags: Rainbiow Youth Niagara, Sugar Bush Adventure, White Meadows Farm
Call of Ignorance, I mean Duty
Posted March 2nd, 2012 by BarryV | No CommentsI unwillingly admit that I am an online gamer (judge me later I have free time and need to fill it somehow). I recently started playing Call of Duty online on the XBOX 360 and the language used disgusted me. When someone loses or things don’t go their way word like “Nigger”, or “Faggot” (I feel wrong just typing them) are used as insults to undermine the other player or vent frustration and they are used A LOT. Now I know the nature of these games are violent but does that mean that people who play them are all ignorant and that these word are acceptable to them…?????? NO, it doesn’t, I have no idea as to why these terms are thrown around so loosely, probably because it’s online and they don’t see the damage they do, but allowing these words to still be used is unnacceptable so if you’re like me and you’re sick and tired of ignorance and play online video games report the players who use them for prejudice, I imagine the last thing Microsoft wants to be associated with is creating an environment where racism and prejudice is acceptable.
Posted in category: Language and Labels | Tags: Call of Duty, Ignorance, Microsoft, Real Talks
Show Your Love in London Ontario
Posted February 26th, 2012 by BarryV | No CommentsI recently hosted a dinner party with 20 individuals and it was a great success. My friends and I enjoyed a meal at a local establishment which was reserved for the evening. Throughout the night we switched partners and seats in an attempt to get to know each other and compete for prizes that were genrously donated by my parents. An enjoyable evening was had by all and I received comments from my friends who said they had a lot of fun and also learned a lot as well. I presented a brief presentation on what the Youth Line does as well as some solid videos on Homophobia and Transphobia. I would like to thank my friends and family for supporting and look forward to going bigger and hopefully more public next year.
Posted in category: Youth Line | Tags: Donate, events, Fundraising, show your love









