| |
 |
| |
 |
| |
|
A
Never Ending Process by Aamer
Coming out has been an on going process for me.
I came out to the idea of being with guys when I
was young, but I never knew what that could have
meant. Then as time went out, I realized that there
was a name for those kinds of feelings. It was called
being gay or being queer. I didn’t have a
problem with it because it felt natural. But as
time went out, I felt the need to have to ‘come
out’ to people who were close to me, just
because I felt I was living two lives. I spoke and
acted different around those who didn’t know
I was gay. I slowly started to come to close friends
and some were very accepting and some didn’t
say anything bad but my relationship with them faded
away.
I always told myself to be proud of myself even
if I felt I was confused. I didn’t care what
many people thought. They either liked me for WHO
I was or they didn’t. I came out to my mom
when I was 18 and she was very disappointed at first,
but as time went out, she started to accept how
I felt and always told me that she trusted my choice
(like it was a choice) and that I should always
be careful.
Since then I have come out to a lot more people,
including many family members. And even though they
all seem accepting, they all have told me numerous
times that they wish I’d reconsider and change
myself. I respect how they feel, perhaps because
they might not know any better, but at least they
take pride in having me as part of their family,
regardless of how I identify.
I have realized though that a lot is associated
with labels such as gay, lesbian, etc. I wish I
didn’t have to label myself and that I could
just say, “Hi, I’m Aamer,” and
that’s it. I feel that I am always developing
and growing with time and there are always changes
in how I feel and how I see things. It’s a
deeper and truer process of coming out – of
coming out of this shell of labels and stereotypes
and just being who I am.
 |
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
